I Love All of Your Strengths

relationship building Feb 09, 2021

Two inspiring stories of strengths-based relationships! 

What will happen when we think about what is right with people rather than fixating on what is wrong with them?”  

Don Clifton, Founder of CliftonStrengths

If you’re a CliftonStrengths fan, you’ve likely heard this famous strengths quote. This particular quote is often shared as the heart behind the strengths philosophy, but what would it look like to apply this question to the ones we love? 

It’s easy to pinpoint what annoys us about each other. 

I bet it wouldn’t take long for you to come up with a list of your loved one’s quirks and vices. But could you just as easily name your partner’s unique strengths?  

Noticing what isn’t perfect is easy, but what if this Valentine’s Day, a day focused on loving one another, you took a moment to consider what makes your partner special? 

We had the opportunity to check in with two couples who focused on each other’s strengths during their engagements, and the results are nothing short of transformative.  

Gerald & Ariana

Gerald and Ariana's engagement photo
Gerald & Ariana

Gerald and Ariana paid attention to each other’s strengths throughout their engagement, and this practice brought them to a powerful, joint mission for their life together…

"We did a few marriage prep courses before deciding to focus on our strengths together through strengths coaching. Focusing on strengths allowed us to practically apply our strengths to develop an even deeper understanding of how to empower one another, elevate our relationship, and cultivate individual talents. 

As an engaged couple, we have an improved understanding of what makes each other tick, how each other thinks, and how to better communicate with one another. Going through the exact definitions of our strengths allowed us to create a joint mission statement. Now we understand what we are working towards together. 

There is no better starting point to unlock your true potential as a married a couple than by focusing on each other’s strengths."

John & Meredith

Meredith & John's engagement photo
John & Meredith

Meredith and John also came to powerful conclusions after learning about each other’s strengths… 

"Pre-marital strengths coaching was an irreplaceable tool during our engagement season. We have very polarizing sets of strengths, but the training gave us the power to approach life’s challenges as one unit instead of two unique personalities. It was encouraging to see the “gaps” in one person’s core strengths were filled by a strength of our partner’s, fusing our bond and filling empty space. We now see one partner’s insufficiencies as an opportunity to lean on each other for assistance—a true partnership! We’re so grateful for the time spent understanding and practicing (because it takes practice) strengths together!"

Whether or not you know your partner’s CliftonStrengths, you can strengthen your relationship this week with our quick and easy Valentine’s challenge: 

  1. Observe your partner throughout the week, looking for what makes them unique 
  2. Write down 3 ways your partner is uniquely gifted 
  3. Share your partner’s 3 unique talents with them via text or a hand-written love note 

Appreciating your partner’s strengths will take just a few minutes, but the outcome could be the start of a positive, stronger chapter in your relationship.  

We want to know—What do you love about your partner? What makes your partner unique? Let us know in the comments below!  

If you or your partner are interested in learning more about your strengths and how to apply them daily, click here.

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